New Years Eve

Tonight there is a Chinese New Year themed party at my work. I am here checking people in, and then I am looking forward to going home. Why, might you ask, am I as a young not quite single, fun loving girl going out for the evening? Well if the last three new years have taught me nothing else, they have taught me that I am just as likely to have fun at home as I would be going out somewhere. Let us take a walk down New Years past and look at the last few of mine...

December 31, 2005 is Steve and my first New Years together. We got back a few days earlier from the Bahamas so going out and doing anything to crazy is not an option. We end up at the local casino, board our of our minds. By the time it is 11:30 we are both very ready to go home, but being on the road at our first New Years does not sound very romantic. The solution: hang out in the sports bar and order some greasy goodness to bring in the New Year. The thing about the sports bar is that the new year came and went without anyone saying one word...

December 31, 2006 we plan ahead, to try to have a better New Year than the year before. We end up buying slightly expensive tickets to do something fun in San Francisco. We are both really looking forward to it and get all dolled up for the occasion. When we arrive we realize it is not nearly as cool as the fliers let on, and are completely out of our element. We give up at about 10:30, go to a liquor store to get some alcohol, and bring in the new year in the hotel room. Not the most exciting thing we have ever done...

December 30, 2007 we are in Vancouver, Canada for the holiday. We decide to go take a nap before we go out that evening. I take a nap, the firefighter falls asleep for the evening. One hour later I am wide awake, he is snoring next to me. I stay up until 4am reading Memoirs of a Geisha (still one of the best books I have read). This leads into

December 31, 2007 we are up early to do all sorts of tourist things in a foreign country. I make a big deal about going out that evening, and he had better not pass out on me again. We go out to a very nice dinner (even though we had to wait well over an hour to be seated), and decide to go back to the hotel to change into something more comfortable and warmer... At this point I decide I am to tired to take another step and tell him I have to go to bed. I think that I was asleep by about 10pm (the firefighter still harasses me about me passing out after threatening him repeatedly during the day about the need to go out).

So with that, we decide this is the year to just stay home, and that is exactly what we are going to do. Well, as soon as I am done checking people in that wanted to go out and party at work. Happy New Year!

This and That

I have a cold sore, and I hate cold sores


There is less than 40 days until the wedding (crazy)

Christmas is in two days (very crazy)


This is from the bridal shower. I don't know exactly what is going on with Heather in this picture, but I have a few ideas that involve my step-mother...

Me and my Brook e. at the shower. She sent me tons more pictures, but I don't really have time to upload them now, and I will be onto something new by the next time I post. (I bought this top the day before after I realized that I would be the center of attention at the shower and I must at least be wearing a cute shirt)

The Mountains

For those who have warm and fuzzy thoughts about living in the mountains, here is a little tid-bit of what I had to deal with on Monday morning as I was leaving for work. This is the firefighters truck.

Our house. We can't park in the driveway when it snows because we won't be able to get out.

And this is my truck. Did I mention that when I opened the door a pile of snow went all over my seat and I could not get it all off, so my seat was wet as I was driving to work, grrr. I took off my jacket to remedy the situation and sat on that.

I should also mention at this point that the firefighter wants me to trade my truck in so that we can get a car. I politely informed him that I do not know how to put on chains, and I am perfectly content never learning that skill. Our compromise: if/when it snows I will take his truck and he will drive the car to put on chains, so perhaps next year about this time there will be a picture of my firefighter trying to put on chains in the snow (evil giggle).

Orange Room

The upstairs bedroom, that is currently the guest bedroom, but will be the master bedroom sometime in the next year (if Steve has his way it will be next week, if I have my way it will be when all of the renovations are done, it is just smarter, I also want to wait until we can afford to furnish it all with furniture I actually like).

Me looking like a big dork while talking on the phone and beginning the painting...
The finished product, it really all is the cream color that is behind me in the picture above, it is just hard to tell without the white wall comparison.

The orange wall, I wanted to paint in a darker orange, but my wonderful firefighter did not, me being the good wifey gave in, and I am sure I will be slightly annoyed with the color as long as we live in the house, but oh well... Anna, we did not get to paint it your color because the closest store that sells Sherwin Williams is two hours away, wasn't going to happen...

This week in pictures

I don't think that there is anything more precious than slobber kisses from a child you love. This is my nephew Bradley, or Studley as I like to call him. Yes, he does have a shiner (he is a boy who has two cousins who know no fear)

Even better than slobber kisses is slobber kisses during bath time. I thought about putting the naked-po pictures of him lying on his back splashing like there was no tomorrow, but some things need to be saved for future embarrassment.

The best part...

of Thanksgiving was (other than hanging out with lots of family that I have not seen in a long time). OK, ok, the best single moment of Thanksgiving was- wait, the stuff leading up to it, you need to hear first.

My sister called me just as Steve was leaving Sonora and wanted my niece to go with us. Steve was going to pick me up at work, about an hour from where we live. Michaelyn called. I called Steve. Called Michaelyn. Called Steve. Called Michaelyn. Called Steve, at this point I got smart and told Steve to call Michaelyn so that I could be productive at my desk the last hour I would be there for a few days. Sure enough, an hour later Steve and my niece, Jenica, come walking into the office. They were a very cute pair. We drove to Reno (btw-driving in a car with a kid for four hours without any modern conveniences that many parents have like a DVD player, or books, toys, or anything that is slightly amusing is slightly annoying). I finally got phone service and purchased a game to play on my phone (another complaint, stupid new phones that don't come with any games for moments just like this).

We finally got to Reno, and helped my aunt do a lot of the prep work for dinner the next night. We hung out, played, had dinner, and finally left to the hotel.

This is where it gets good. Jenica has never been to Reno before, and she was amazed. One of my favorite of her phrases was, "This is so much better than Vegas." Oh wait, has Jenica ever been to Vegas, no. After we checked in and Steve and I decided the best place to take a kid when one is in Reno, Circus Circus. We saw a couple shows and won her a few stuffed animals. In the midst of all of this she ecstatically said, "THIS IS THE BEST NIGHT EVER!" It was very cute, perhaps my new favorite quote, and the best single moment of my Thanksgiving vacation. It loses a little umph in text, you'll just have to imagine.

A little poem

So, my sister just found this poem in one of my mom's books.

Testament

But how can I live without you? -she cried

I left all world to you when I died:
Beauty of earth and air and sea;
Leap of a swallow or a tree;
Kiss of rain and wind's embrace;
Passion of storm and winter's face;
Touch of feather, flower, and stone;
Chiselled line of branch or bone;
Flight of stars, nights caravan;
Song of crickets-and of man-
All these I put in my testament,
All these I bequeathed you when I went.

But how can I see them without your eyes
Or touch them without your hand?
How can I hear them without your ear,
Without your heart, understand?

These too, these too
I leave to you!
(I love in you)

The part in parenthesis my mom wrote in at the bottom of the page. I for the life of me cannot remember right now who the author is. It is a nice poem though.

Makes me happy

Right now, while I am sitting at work my firefighter is at home painting the guest bedroom so we can have it finished (I use that term loosely) by the time company comes next week. Do you know why else it makes me happy? No? Well, I will tell you. I get to have an orange wall in this room (I don't know why he is complaining, it is the color of fire, and fire makes him happy). And just so everyone does not think that I am lazy, I did paint 3/4 of it on Saturday. I could have finished it on Sunday, but I was to busy driving my wonderful firefighter around after he had had to much to drink (the Cowboys played at 10, they won, but it also means that the party started early).

I'll post pictures soon of my orange wall (soon is another term that I use loosely).

Nicknames

My whole life I have been known as Celeste-Pie. I remember being a teenager and telling my mom I did not want her to call me Celeste-Pie any longer. She just kind of said OK and looked away. A few months later she told me that I would always be her Celeste-Pie. After that I just got over being called Celeste-Pie. Now, I love it. I am Auntie Pie, Auntie Celeste-Pie, and still just Celeste-Pie (Note from the author, years later the author was reading her mom's journal after she had passed away and the only thing written in her journal on one day was that Celeste asked me to not call her Celeste-Pie anymore).

Some of my favorite nick-names now are the one's the my Firefighter calls me randomly. For instance, every now and then he will call me Goddess Divine, and this I love. He does not call me that very often, but it always brings a smile to my face when he does. My other favorite nickname from Steve is sunshine. This is especially the best when he looks over at me first thing in the morning and says it when he is still groggy. It makes my heart go pitter-pat...

Serenity

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I think perhaps this should become my mantra. I have heard this prayer hundreds, maybe even thousands of times. I have some family that is clean and sober, and that is what it always represented. I never really thought about what it was actually saying, until now...

Serenity, basically means peace and tranquility, as I am sure you know. For those of you who don't know me really well, I am a lover of people. My heart breaks for people. I also wear my heart on my sleeve. That is why serenity is the part I need to focus on. I need to be peaceful and calm in the midst of situations that I have no control over. How does one remain calm in the midst of situations that are overwhelming? That part I don't know, not yet at least... However, that is why it should become my mantra or prayer. In order to be a positive influence of change in the midst of life, I have to be aware of what I have no control over, and let it be. Let me tell you, it is physically and emotionally draining to try to do it otherwise.

Cravings...

So, I am not pregnant, first of all. I am the type of person that craves the same thing for weeks and weeks and then, I don't eat it for a year. Right now I am craving peanut butter. I love it. I have a jar of it on my desk and a spoon and I just eat it with a spoon. Sooo gooood. With Thanksgiving coming up I am also craving cranberry sauce. Specifically jellied cranberry sauce. I could open a can and eat the whole thing in one sitting all by itself. Last week when Steve and I were at the grocery store he was messing around with me asking if I had everything, only he was asking me if I had crazy and absurd things that we never eat. He asked if I had jellied cranberry sauce and when I told him I threw a couple cans in the cart he just looked at me. Stunned? Appalled? I just don't know. Either way jellied cranberry sauce is still fabulous in my book.

One Joy

One joy of not being in school right now is that I have regained the ability to read whatever I want, whenever I want. I have just finally read The Alchemist, a book someone... gave me a long time ago to read, and I have started My Sister's Keeper, a book I have wanted to read for years, but never had a chance in the midst of the short break between semesters. The break between the semesters was the only time I allowed myself to read fun books, because for some reason when one is reading some historical novel or something else, reading up on Hofstede is just not as exciting. I realize most reading this blog will have no idea who Hofstede is. He made a lot of advances in Intercultural and International Communication, as for as reading goes though, not so much fun.

So, reading whatever I want= very fun. Not having to worry about homework= very fun. There is still a big part of me that wants to be working on my master though, hopefully someday in the near future.

Let's be honest...

It feels like the world is falling all around me. In the midst of everything that is going on I am trying to keep my head up and do my part to keep others moving.

It makes me more thankful for my life. While things are falling apart around me, my life is continuing. Situations around me make me that much more thankful for Steve and the relationship that we have. Also for him as a person, his gruff exterior is giving way to his love for me and for my family. I am so thankful to have a job and that Steve has a job so we can afford to give ourselves a wedding in the midst of financial stress with so many others. I am thankful for a family that loves, even if the love is shifting and changing, as is the nature of the family.

I won't lie, I have had some emotional break-downs in the midst of everything that is occurring in my life. However, I see that though the storm rages around me, I continue. Now I just hope that the perma-sick to my stomach feeling that has been going on for the last couple days will mellow out.

Mondays

I hate the Mondays where you feel like you never even had a weekend, and then all of a sudden, it is Monday. Hmph! Other than that, things are moving along. I'm starting to get excited about the bridal shower. I'm really excited about Thanksgiving in Reno, especially about getting out of "life as usual" for a couple days. Until then, back to work I go.

Today

I am having one of those days where life just kind of slaps you in the face. I don't know if it is a wake-up call or what. I think one of my problems is that I just care to much, that kind of sounds weird or conceited, but I care A LOT. I wear my hear on my sleeve, which breaks quite often for the smallest and most random things. I remember being back in seminary and praying one day that my heart would be broken by the things that break the heart of God, and I kind of think he did it. So, now I am trying to learn to guard my heart a little better, so I don't get as upset by these various things. And like I said, today I am getting slapped in the face. Life is good.

Voting

Well, that is what I did this morning, and I hope everyone else did the same.

A few things I have been wondering about lately...

I am wondering how to more actively plan for my future and my goals. How does one get a plan of action for the rest of their life? How does one formulate a plan to even achieve short-term goals?

I am wondering how Christians have made abortion the ultimate evil in the world of politics, and they can ignore so many other things (dare I say, sins)???

Optimistic

I admit it, there is an absurd mix of a realist and an optimist fighting for ground in this body of mine.

Realist: Politicians are most often sell outs
Optimist: The "most often" part

Realist: My family is falling apart
Optimist: Perhaps we can all still make it through as a family

Realist: People are stupid
Optimist: Well, not all people

Let the battle continue, but for today the optimist portion is winning out, however, there is still a few more days until Tuesday...

Grateful

Well, I have friends e-mailing be about wedding fun, one with "wedding fever." This makes me very excited because I don't have many people in my life that are into the whole wedding thing- I am grateful to have a few people who care and are helping. Thanks

And one more thing

My handsome nephew, Bradley, was on the cover of the local newspaper here, and this is the picture, him dressed as a Knight. Oh yeah, he is a little stud.

Three Things

Three things I love:
1) Steve looking at me first thing in the morning and saying, "Good Morning Sunshine"
2) Finishing a task/list...
3) Having three day weekends

Three things I don't like (I am kind of against saying hate, because my mom used to day, "You hate the devil, you dislike that...")
1) Drinking to much
2) Lack of Confidence
3) People taking things off of my desk

Three places I would love to visit (the whole world, but these are a few first)
1) Italy
2) New Zealand
3) Boston

Three things I would like to accomplish
1) Getting my masters degree
2) Getting into political office
3) Having a "good" marriage

Three people I know who inspire me
1) Brother Justin
2) Bissie Lee
3) My sisters (I guess that makes it four)

Three things I could eat (nearly) every day for the rest of my life
1) Sushi
2) Jamba Juice
3) Mexican Food

I am sure I could come up with a bunch more three's, but I should probably get back to work now.

Wedding Hair

So, I think it is finally official. I have a wedding hair style. Let me tell you that it did not come a moment to soon either. Had I had another bad hair style from my sister-in-law we might have come to blows. Way to much drama surrounding hair.

So, this is how the hair looks from the back. My hair piece is freaking awesome, but I don't think it is going to go on the back of my head like we did it here, instead it is going to go on the side. That is the way I first saw it when I decided to get the hairpiece, and I think that is the way that I like it best. So it is going on the side of my head.

This picture does not do justice for how cool it looks. It took two hours to do it all, so it looks like there will be no escaping me getting up at 6 am on D-Day.

All for the price of beauty too...

For those who are wondering, I am not wearing a veil. This is it for the flash and flare. I am not wearing a necklace either, I am just going to wear some dangle earrings and call it good. Even though the hair style does not show it, I am in fact a simple girl.

100 Days

Well theknot.com has just informed me that there are 100 days until the wedding. This is good because there is still big chunk of this shin-dig that I need to pay for. There is a part of me that just wishes the party were here. It is nothing about being married or spending the rest of my life with Steve... all that is already going to happen. I am looking forward to a party I have been planning for the last six months and will continue to plan for the next 100 days.

Mostly though, I am just trying to enjoy being engaged. I only have 100 days left of something I will never experience again. I don't know exactly how to enjoy it though. The stress, the emotions, and the frustrations are all part of this period of life, but how do I enjoy what else is going on??? How do I even recognize the little tid-bits that only occur when one is engaged?

Apples and Elections

Well, right now we are selling apples at Ironstone Vineyards. These are the kind of apples you crave when you are reminiscent of apples you ate when growing up.

Next-quite surprised about Colin Powell's endorsement of Obama. It makes me smile (just because I want to hear my dad talk about it later...)

The quote of the week, "Them are the true playas." -by Executive Chef James Lehman (it was truly funny when he said it, and I will butcher it if I attempt to tell the story.

The Weekend

A few adventures in my weekend... My diploma finally came in the mail!!!
Steve with my dipoloma-his picture looks better than any of my pictures with my diploma. He took me out to Seven Sisters to celebrate (a very nice restaurant). BTW-he was the one who wanted to take this picture. He might have been more excited than I was.

My sister-in-law straightened my hair in pursuit of wedding hair styles... There was tons of drama surrounding this, none of which is worth boring all of you beautiful people.

And other than that, life has been very busy. Until next time...

A walk with my sister that turned into a walk down memory lane

The other day I was talking to my sister Amber. She is one of my favorite people in the world. We decided to go for a walk. In the midst of this walking we started talking about my mom. We talk about her frequently, but this time we were really talking about the end of her life instead of just how much we miss her and wish she were here.

I wish someone would have told me how much I would regret not spending more time with her. I was 17 when she was diagnosed with cancer and 19 when she finally passed away. I moved away for three months of that time and did not see her at all. When I finally did see her I moved home about two weeks later, because I did not realize how bad it was getting.

Here is the thing, my mom was a devout christian. I never thought she was going to die. I 100% believed that she was going to be healed. That is all we were aloud to talk about. We were never to talk about the possibility of death-most of the people in our lives at the time were telling us that if we talked about death it would demonstrate our doubt.

Being in a place where you are confronted with death daily, but don't believe it is going to happen is, well, odd. I think one of the reasons I did not spend more time around the house is because I never thought she was going to die.

The second reason is because I was in high school, and just getting out of high school and I was selfish. I did not want to hang out with my family, I wanted to be with my friends.

All this being said, while walking with my sister the other day she and I both really wish that someone had told us to get our heads out of our a** and spend time with our mom. Nothing else matters from those two years other than the time spent with my mom.

I know it is worse now because I am getting married soon, and I don't really get to see my sisters a whole lot lately. I just wish my mom were here now.

And the winner is...

Ok- we did not win the stomp portion of grape stomp, but we did get first place for our outfits. Some people might say that the stomp is the most important part of the competition, but those people would be wrong. This was us right before the competition. Perhaps this is why we only got sixth in the stomp with all of the other vineyards. This is us actually stomping. Oh yeah, we have skills. Hatcher was the Vineyard that won this portion, and the overall. Steve and I are part of Hatcher's wine club, so I am ok with them winning. Plus they did not look nearly as good as we did. They did get three times more juice than we got.
This is after the competition with the president of the vineyard where I work.

And this is us looking fabulous with some Ironstone wine before the stomp. Jessica is the receptionist and my partner in crime in regards to all things Ironstone. For winning we both got $50, 3 bottles of wine, and passport for passport weekend, and a blue ribbon (I know have mine hanging on the fridge at home). The real joy is being able to tell everyone we are number one.

Stomp Weekend

Well, it is the grape stomp in Murphys this weekend. There is also a concert at my work. The receptionist and I somehow ended up being the team to represent Ironstone (where I work). We have had many managers tell us how important it is that we come home with a ribbon. This is all good and great but this is our first year, and we are going up against mulit-year stomp off winners. So, we decided the best way for us to win is to win the costume part or the competition.

Our bosses are so committed to us winning I did not hear one negative comment when I was working on our costume all afternoon at my desk. Hopefully I will get pictures of our awesome costume (we are making hula skirts out of corks), until then you will just have to envision it. Put up good thoughts for the "Six Mile Stompers" tomorrow so that we can bring home a ribbon. FYI- We are the six mile stompers because the vineyard where we work is on Six Mile Road-clever, I know.

Until next time-keep on stomping, San Diego.

Registering

Well, we finally went and did it when Steve was home this last weekend. I have been looking forward to this moment for months now. I have a small joy when I go over to someones' house who has been married for ten or twenty years and they pull out something that you find out later was a wedding present. It is a fun little walk down memory lane. So, we decide to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond first.

Problem One: Steve and I have a lot of stuff already. We don't NEED new towels, or plates, or any of these things. This is fine for Steve. However, I am more of the opinion that I don't like our plates, and eventually we will NEED new towels and everything else, so we might as well register for them and get them for free instead of buying them later.

Problem Two: I am much more into entertaining than Steve is. So I want to register for things that are mainly used when there is company, and for quantities that you need when you have company. Steve does not see the point of serving dishes, fun glasses and goblets and things like this.

So, after an hour or two of walking around and compromise we were both exhausted. We get back to the front of the store and the girl is amazed that we registered so quickly, and she is pleased with the amount of items on our registry. Thank God.

I was not in the mood for any more registering after this. I have gone on line and adjusted a few items without Steve's watchful eye on me. I also set up a registry for him at Lowe's. Very exciting, and I think that is going to be it for our registry. Not very exciting, but it is done, and there is some good stuff on there.

Sleeping Alone

So, I admit it, when Steve first leaves for a fire, I am pretty excited about sleeping alone. Not that I sleep badly when he is home, I don't. But, being able to sleep however I want with pillows all around me just brings me a little bit of joy.

That is until I have not talked to him in a few days. Because at that point when I go to bed I start to worry about him, and then I start to freak myself out... What if he is hurt? Would someone call me?

Thus I start to freak myself out wondering about something that I can do nothing about. This becomes my fire cycle. Steve is sleeping on the ground somewhere, and I am either sleeping awesome with all the pillows I can fit around me, or I am crazy worried about him with all the pillows around me. Do you know what Steve would say if he read this (not that he will because he has been on a fire since I started blogging and has no idea I do this...) Yes what Steve would say is exactly what my mom would say, "Get over it Celeste."

A fabulous weekend

So, this weekend was a single weekend for me, aka Steve was on a fire (One where we have logged a total of 15 minutes of phone conversation in the last week and a half, but that is another story).

So, while Steve was off bringing home the bacon, I decided to go be irresponsible. So, I headed to LA to see one of my favorite people and hang out in the big city. Unfortunately, I was not irresponsible at all. That is unless you consider if I had been at home I would have been painting the bathroom. I was in bed by midnight every night. Completely responsible for a twenty-something in the big city with another twenty-something.

Back to LA. It was the most wonderful weekend that I have had in resent memory. We laughed, we went to the beach, we did very little shopping (especially since both of us are on a tight budget). It was completely wonderful, also because I did not stay awake pondering how an astronaut would die if (s)he if they somehow floated away from the spaceship...

Blogging Virgin

Yes, it is true. After months of, well, reading other blogs... I have decided that I... to... must jump on the blogging band wagon. Why have I finally decided this? Well, there are a handful of reasons. Mostly I realized yesterday that I used to love to journal, it really helped me through a lot of really tough times.

Not that I am having a tough time now, in fact it is quite the contrary. I am perfectly content with my life as it is now, if not, dare I say, happy.

The other reason for now jumping off the bridge with many of my fabulous friends is that it is nice keeping tabs on people who I do not get to see nearly as often as I would like.

So, here it is world, take it or leave it. This is me, raw and uncut. Well, not likely, but who knows...